Category Archives: Uncategorized

Second Time Around

We have been blessed with another wee bundle of joy…well it’s been just over 4 months now but he’s still a tiny bundle compared with his boisterous but adorable toddler brother! There are a few things that I have totally forgotten about when it comes to newborns/babies! Firstly, your hair falls out! My goodness, it falls out so much that I wonder how I still manage to have a head full of thick hair! My hair ends up all over the house, or in the car as I manage to pull out chunks of it when I’m driving along and it’s tickling my neck! My baby is constantly getting it wrapped around his fingers and then in his mouth when he’s sucking on his hands!

Getting out of the house is like a military operation! In the end you just decide not to go anywhere unless it’s absolutely necessary! I found it hard to get into a good routine of leaving the house with 1 child, and I felt like I had finally got the timing right and for the most part could get out of the house without too much drama. Throw in #2 and my goodness the learning curve is high again and I am back to the stage of wondering if it’s worth the effort! There is no such thing as a quick trip to the shops, and you never just duck out for a few minutes if you have the kids in tow! Thank goodness for supermarkets who deliver groceries otherwise we’d just be eating two minute noodles, soup and toast all week!!

Getting out of the house with kids

Image from Google Images

Having a shower is no longer relaxing, at all! I lock the door to have a shower in peace and the toddler screams on the other side of the door and bangs on it just incase I didn’t realise by the screaming that he wanted to come in! If I leave the door open the toddler wants to get into the shower with me! I try to have a shower when my baby is in bed and just before he falls asleep, because unfortunately his room shares a wall with the bathroom (the joys of living in an older house, everything is compact and all close together). Sometimes I can’t manage that for whatever reason (come to think of it, trying to have a shower is close to trying to get out of the house!), so that’s when the door is left open so that my baby can lay on the beanbag where I have a good eye on him – well a good eye on him in case the toddler comes close…on the whole he is great with his baby brother, but there are those moments! I have started showering at night, but by the time I actually get into the shower my eyes are beginning to hang out of my head and I just want to be horizontal and sound asleep! Let’s not even get started on going to the toilet on your own!!!

The sleep deprivation, and that needs to be in italics for added emphasis on how bad this is! I completely understand why it’s been used as a form of torture because, quite frankly, it is torture, and even more so with a toddler thrown into the mix who doesn’t want to sleep when the baby sleeps so that you can sleep, or even let you lay your head down on the couch for a little snooze! I have tried the latter, only to have all sorts of toys, mainly cars, driven up my face all the while making extremely loud ‘zooom’ noises and calling ‘Mummy! Mummy!’.

I know that these things aren’t anything new at all! Most, if not all, Mum’s experience these things and more. The nice thing is to be able to share and vent with people so that you don’t feel totally alone and like you are the only one that experiences these things!

What are some of the daily battles you face that you have forgotten about since having your first child? Or even if you only have one child, are there other things here that you have found difficult or challenging?

When life shifts before your very eyes

It’s been a while between blog posts, which I am annoyed about!! I always have good intentions to sit down and do some writing, but unfortunately life gets in the way! In the last little while, I have been working through the role of Mum and wife versus me – I have struggled a bit with feeling like I don’t have anything for me anymore, and that the responsibilities of life hang on my shoulders and begin to weigh me down. I love being a Mum, nothing fills me with joy more than seeing my little boy happy as Larry and laughing! I love being told that I am loved and hearing him call out Mum (even in the wee hours of the morning, although I would be happy if he decided he didn’t want to do that anymore). I also love my husband, and love being his wife. I took on my husband’s surname after we got married, and I say it with pride. I am blessed to have a very supporting partner in life, and for the most part we share the same visions and goals in our life together as a family. I am also really looking forward to welcoming our second child in a few months time, and whilst it brings with it some unknowns around what life will be like with two kids, I am excited for my son to be a big brother, and to see my husband fall in love with a new wee person in our lives!

However, there are still moments where I just find it all overwhelming and I begin to feel ‘lost’. I feel like I don’t know myself anymore – I used to be independent, driven, goal orientated and wasn’t one to sit around and wait for things to happen. I am still like that, I think, but it just all looks a bit different now. I am certainly still someone who doesn’t wait around for things to happen, I am not known for sitting on my backside all day long (well I don’t think so anyway, someone tell me if I have that perception of myself all wrong!!). I have goals and I am driven, but the game has changed and the goal posts have shifted, I just need to get myself onto that page and realign myself. What has been comforting to hear is that other women before me have felt the exact same way, and that I am not alone in coming to this sort of realisation like a sack of potatoes falling to the ground! It sounds like a fairly common new mum thing to come across, and it’s more than likely (as one friend said) going to happen when #2 arrives and the goal posts will shift again!

I read lots of blog posts that happen to pop up in my Facebook feed which all support and back up how I feel sometimes. I am also a big believer that identifying the triggers to your feelings is half the battle, then the other half comes in putting strategies in place to help you overcome and deal with it. I am working on the strategies, and have been trialling a few things with some good results. I feel that I am my own person as much as I am a mum and a wife, and once I’ve given them some time to manifest and work, I will share these strategies with you. For now, if you are feeling like I am (or have) and have just picked yourself off the floor out of the foetal position and you’ve wiped the tears away (don’t worry, I have so been there), just know that you are not alone! If you don’t feel that you have anyone you can share your worries with, you can drop me a line at wintermumblog(at)gmail(dot)com and I’d be happy to share some of the resources that I have found that have helped me along the way…I will share them here, as I have said, I just need to put that particular post together first!!

Feel free to comment any thoughts you have on this – you might have gone through something very similar when you had a young family, or you’re going through it now…you may even have some helpful thoughts to share, I’d love to hear them 🙂

It’s been a while

It’s been a while since I’ve posted on this blog, and not because I haven’t wanted to. I just haven’t found the time to sit down for more than 10 minutes whilst my mind is fresh! Time seems to get away from me, and in the past few months it’s felt more so than other times.

It’s the middle of winter here in my neck of the woods, and today you can certainly feel it!! It’s freezing, wet and there’s a very chilly wind! Colds are doing the rounds in our family, and we’re lucky that the lemon tree in the backyard is bursting with ripe yellow fruit.

For anyone else feeling a cold coming on, try this cold blasting drink!!

What are your cold busting tips this winter? I’d love to hear them!

When I win the lottery…

Image

I admit, I lay awake some nights planning my home renovation, even though there are no plans to actually do any renovating in the near future – we’ve only just finished updating the interior of the house after 4 years of living in it! But I blame Pinterest, Houzz and any other website/app that feeds my already overflowing mind with ideas and dreams. I have been known to wake up in the wee hours of the morning with what seems like such an architectural brainwave or two, and then am so excited with my mental achievement that I can’t get back to sleep!! There are so many wonderful home improvement and renovation ideas out there, but the main problem that seems to stop us from doing any of them, or even thinking about the massive overhaul we may or may not do on this current house down the track, is money!! Why does money have to be the deciding factor on so many things?! I really need to win the lottery, but seriously I’d have to buy a ticket to be in the running, and I just don’t seem to be disciplined enough to go that far! So, for now, it looks like I’ll continue along my merry, dreamy way, conjuring up all sorts of wonderful ideas for my imaginary renovation, at all ungodly hours of the morning!

On wanting not needing

Money Tree Print by SheRidesTheLion on Etsy

Money Tree Print by SheRidesTheLion on Etsy

 

This year I have been trying to be conscious of the buying choices that I make. For items other than necessary household purchases, I have asked myself the question ‘Do I need it or do I just want it?’ before actually making a purchase. I went shopping with friends a few months ago and found a pair of ankle boots that were just what I wanted…but instead of making the purchase and adding something else to our credit card, I asked myself the question and quickly put the desired ankle boots back down. I certainly didn’t need them, they were a want, and honestly I have that many shoes my cupboard is bursting with them. There are a few reasons for doing this – financial is definitely one of them, because we want to get better at living within our means without popping things onto credit at the drop of a hat (which we have been fairly good at doing this year but there’s always room for improvement!!). We have also discussed being consumed by material possessions that are meant to make our lives simpler but in the end make us feel cluttered and over flowing instead. We just don’t have the room to have more items that we honestly don’t really need.

I have been following a blog this year called Nothing New. It’s about one woman’s quest to live more simply and be less taken by consumerism. It has been really inspiring, and whilst I am definitely nowhere near as good as her at this, I am definitely better than I was. I have referred to Sash before in this post; she has made me think about what makes me happy – is it really buying new clothes, homewares and toys for my son when we are already tripping over the ones he has?! It isn’t always easy, and there have been times where I have made justifications that turned a purchase from a want to a need, but most of the time what follows is guilt. I am someone who needs less stress in my life, not more, so guilt is an emotion I can do without…it’s this that often stops me from making purchases that are wants. No one is perfect, and after having many years at uni and trying to make it in the big smoke – socialising and buying the latest fashion trends – I have had my fair share of living off credit cards, eating baked beans and tinned spaghetti at the end of a pay cycle, and I remember how stressful that was. I have progressed a bit since then and make wiser financial choices, but since hearing about Sash’s journey with the Nothing New project, I have thought a lot more about what makes me happy and what I spend my money on. Don’t get me wrong, I still splash out and spoil myself every now and again, but when I do it’s generally on something that I have admired for a while and saved up to get, or it might simply be buying a coffee and then joining my son and friends, or just my son, at the park. It’s often the simple things in life that bring us the most joy, and they don’t always have to cost money.

Does anyone else feel that they spend time justifying purchases that perhaps you really didn’t need and then felt guilty about it afterwards?! Does anyone else ask themselves the question of ‘is this a need or a want?’ before making a purchase? I’d be interested to hear your stories, and especially hear from those who also do this and how you have made it work for you. 

William Morris 'have nothing in your house' by BookishlyUK on Etsy

William Morris ‘have nothing in your house’ by BookishlyUK on Etsy